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(NSFW) All fat women are not created equal

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(NSFW) All fat women are not created equal

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I wrote a post on my Tumblr about being body positive and accepting myself. It felt really good to stand in my truth of honesty; no spanx, no corset, no bra, no slimming enhancer pants, no expensive back fat reduced-optical illusion garment. Just me, a nice camera angle and a filter.

When I first snapped the picture I was like, “Oh my goodness, I’m so fat. Look at all these stretch marks. Ugh, my fupa, the bane of my existence, the reason my crop top game can’t flourish. These flabby arms ugh”. But the more I looked at it, the more softer and sensual I appeared to myself.

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My one and only internet nude. Hope my political career can survive this

Sensual, soft, seductive, tempting, desirable – these are some of the words I used to describe myself when I looked at my nude. I put it on Tumblr and got warm feedback. I put it on Facebook and of course it went all downhill from there.

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Even Apple knows this is some BS

The reactions produced a mixture of body shaming, unsolicited dick pics from men I don’t know and a slew of rude comments from both men and women. Women told me putting up a nude of myself is just asking for trouble. Men told me I can’t demand respect because I’m naked. Why not?

Nudity is not exclusively sexual. I love nudity and maybe if I were posed in a sexual way, then maybe I could understand. But even then, so what?

People have been posing nudes forever but society as a whole is selective about what’s considered art vs pornographic. There’s a thin line between indecency and artistic and to consider something artistic it has to move you, if fat bodies don’t move you, chances are you won’t view it as something natural, human or normal.

Fat bodies that are “acceptable” are overly sexualized and sometimes even preyed on. Even when I’m dressed like a Jehovah’s Witness, men still approach me being crass and rude. They feel that’s okay because I’m very busty and have full hips so my fatness becomes just an object. My fatness is rarely seen as sensual by others-it’s more like extra girth for a man to conquer, never delicate and gentle.

All fat bodies are not created equal. Fat bodies are becoming more acceptable (finally), but there’s still a standard of what the ideal attractive fatness is. That’s perfectly fine when it comes to preferences but it shouldn’t be a society standard.

People also misconstrue my thoughts on body positivity with my self-esteem; a few might assume I’m only exposing myself for compliments or reassurance. I can assure you that I’m not in dire need of either.

When I was younger there weren’t many options of plus size celebrities to admire. Seriously, my idols were/are Queen Latifah, Countess Vaughn, Miss Piggy and Missy Elliot. Even then, they were not uber sexy. There wasn’t a full-figured equivalent to Lil Kim and Foxy Brown. Now, there are social media platforms that celebrates plus size bodies in all shapes (not just hourglass and pear shaped bodies) and forms which I’m sure helps a lot of young teens. Body image is so important to teens that it is imperative that they know they are represented in mainstream culture.

So if my nude body offends you, I don’t really give a shit. Seriously, I don’t care.

I do care that you respect my feelings as I express myself.

I also appreciate the people that can differentiate between a sex symbol and a sex object.

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1 Comment

1 Comment

  1. Kate

    January 4, 2016 at 12:52 AM

    Your article made me think of this awesome video! Super empowering and inspirational just like this article 🙂

    https://www.facebook.com/Cosmopolitan/videos/10153777403092708/?pnref=story

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